Well it took me many years but I have now excepted that I am a bald man in the middle of my life and you know what? I don't really care any more.
Loosing your hair in your thirties is very common I know but when it happens to you it can be very hard to deal with. It was all the harder for me because I always had long flowing locks and if I knew I was going to loose my hair I might have cut it all of in preparation for the onset of my baldness and not had to endure all the long hairs in the plughole and on my pillow! Still, one good thing has come of it in that I will never have to go to the hairdressers again because I have done the thing that only balding men that have really accepted their hair loss do..... I have bought my own hair clippers. Yes,no more the sitting in the barbers chair and trying not to look at my reflection because that baldy bastard looking back at me was someone I just didn't recognise. Now its just turn on the clippers every couple of weeks and a few minutes later job done. The wife still refuses to do it for me but now I have got the hand of it its no problem and I still have my ears on the side of my head!
In a way it is quite comforting going bald at my age as I know that I will not change that much throughout the rest of my life. Don't get me wrong,I would rather have my hair back but as that is not an option I am OK with it.
The one thing that loosing your hair does to you is it gives you a six sense that only balding men have. As your hair starts to make a break for it you find that you will start to study other men's hair. You ask any bald man and they will tell you that this true.
When you walk down the street and you see another balding man coming towards you,you will study his hair and if the guy has slightly more hair than you have you will call him a bastard under your breath. But if he has less hair than you have you will put a little smirk on your face as you walk past and you can see that the guy is gutted that you have more hair than him and cursing you under his breath. It is like a small victory for you and you feel happy for the next few seconds.
Another gift that you find that you have is that you can pick out things about men's hair that are just not right. Here is an example of this....
A few years ago I went into the post office to get the car tax.The cue was quite big so I was about 10 people from the front. I checked out the man behind the window who was serving everyone and I knew there was something wrong with his hair. I couldn't put my finger on it but my bald man six sense was kicking in and something just wasn't right with this man. From where I was it was his hairline. There was something wrong with his hairline. It was too perfect for a man of his age. Yes that was it. And it was too close to his head,too flat. I slowly worked my way up the cue and as I got to the front it all became clear why my bald man six sense was going wild. When he bent his head over to look in the stamp book the top of his head was like a zebra's belly. Yes, it was a comb over.It was one of the best comb overs I had ever seen but it was a comb over none the less. The thing that get me is that this guy must stand in front of the mirror every day and spend time applying the brylecream to what is left of his hair and then styling it. God, can you be bothered.
I mean everyone knows you are a baldy bastard but you!
Don't you have a girlfriend or wife that tells you how ridiculous you look?
And how do you get your hair cut. Yes mister barber, Short all over apart from this huge tuft of six inch long lengths of hair on the right hand side of my head.If you could just leave them that would be fine. Fuck sake!
